The Woes of Teaching
I like teaching. A lot. It's really been a wonderful career move. But as all things, it has its moments where you want to pound your head through the wall. The working-when-not-at-work thing is a bit annoying (lesson planning, test writing, and paper grading sucks ass - though I haven't had to do the 3rd one in that list, and am currently procrastinating on the 2nd...), as is the 6AM wake-up call (all CPAs reading this, please hold your contempted chuckles).
My most recent frustration has been students speaking so slowly because they are unsure of what word to use. They look to me as they say each word (in a questioning voice) and I have no idea if they've chosen the right word or not simply because they haven't finished the sentence. For instance, "I...explain?...to my colleague?...about?...my ex-husband?" In this instance, the student was confused between "complain" and "explain." That by itself is fine. But if you hear "I explain" and then a dramatic soap-opera style pause and a "is that right?" stare, how do you respond? "I explain" is correct English, but with the rest of the sentence and the intended meaning, it's wrong. There's also the issue of when they think they're using the right word, but are questioning their pronunciation versus when they're not sure they're using the right word in the first place.
Situations like that prompted my roommate to quip, "Teaching these kids reminds me of talking to my ex-boyfriend." Zing.
So given this, you have to do things to make it fun, even if you're the only one in on the joke. For instance, one student was doodling in class, and so I asked her to explain (in English, of course) what she had drawn. She did, and ended with "and here I still have half a page left to play with." I smiled, and said, "Good," all ready to move on.
Yet she responded with, "Yea, I usually play with myself when I'm bored." I did a double-take, and said, "Uhh...you what?" She repeated, "I play with myself when I'm bored." Another student chimed in, "Yea, and she always wins!" The class laughed, but not one of them had any idea the alternative meaning to what had just been said. So, unable to quell my urges, I said "Yea, when I play with myself I always win too." Then my internal voice said, "OK, move on before you really lose it!"
Continued the Eyerman family tradition of making chili for the Super Bowl, and had a small chili cookoff at the place yesterday. As in previous years, all pots of chili were combined in the end, making "super chili." Mom's recent visit and bringing of some American TP was greatly appreciated by some. Yes, the game came on after midnight here. I was able to make to it to an American bar with a few dozen other expats and stay up till 4 to see the whole game. Fortune of fortunes had all my morning classes cancelled today, allowing me to sleep till noon.
One final thought on the effects of teaching English. My knowledge of the language has never been greater. I can identify all tenses, explain phrasal verbs and the difference between "to say" and "to tell." But my spoken English has become horrendous. A combination of being used to dumbing things down to be understood by both my students and the public at large, and for some unknown reason mimicking my students' speech patterns, has me leaving out articles, mixing tenses, and saying things like "Far more better is my knowledge than ever before." Yea, I look forward to interviewing for teaching jobs in the States. "Me fail English? That's unpossible!"
My most recent frustration has been students speaking so slowly because they are unsure of what word to use. They look to me as they say each word (in a questioning voice) and I have no idea if they've chosen the right word or not simply because they haven't finished the sentence. For instance, "I...explain?...to my colleague?...about?...my ex-husband?" In this instance, the student was confused between "complain" and "explain." That by itself is fine. But if you hear "I explain" and then a dramatic soap-opera style pause and a "is that right?" stare, how do you respond? "I explain" is correct English, but with the rest of the sentence and the intended meaning, it's wrong. There's also the issue of when they think they're using the right word, but are questioning their pronunciation versus when they're not sure they're using the right word in the first place.
Situations like that prompted my roommate to quip, "Teaching these kids reminds me of talking to my ex-boyfriend." Zing.
So given this, you have to do things to make it fun, even if you're the only one in on the joke. For instance, one student was doodling in class, and so I asked her to explain (in English, of course) what she had drawn. She did, and ended with "and here I still have half a page left to play with." I smiled, and said, "Good," all ready to move on.
Yet she responded with, "Yea, I usually play with myself when I'm bored." I did a double-take, and said, "Uhh...you what?" She repeated, "I play with myself when I'm bored." Another student chimed in, "Yea, and she always wins!" The class laughed, but not one of them had any idea the alternative meaning to what had just been said. So, unable to quell my urges, I said "Yea, when I play with myself I always win too." Then my internal voice said, "OK, move on before you really lose it!"
Continued the Eyerman family tradition of making chili for the Super Bowl, and had a small chili cookoff at the place yesterday. As in previous years, all pots of chili were combined in the end, making "super chili." Mom's recent visit and bringing of some American TP was greatly appreciated by some. Yes, the game came on after midnight here. I was able to make to it to an American bar with a few dozen other expats and stay up till 4 to see the whole game. Fortune of fortunes had all my morning classes cancelled today, allowing me to sleep till noon.
One final thought on the effects of teaching English. My knowledge of the language has never been greater. I can identify all tenses, explain phrasal verbs and the difference between "to say" and "to tell." But my spoken English has become horrendous. A combination of being used to dumbing things down to be understood by both my students and the public at large, and for some unknown reason mimicking my students' speech patterns, has me leaving out articles, mixing tenses, and saying things like "Far more better is my knowledge than ever before." Yea, I look forward to interviewing for teaching jobs in the States. "Me fail English? That's unpossible!"
posted by David at 10:45 PM
2 Comments:
I identify with all of this. I went backpacking with one of the classes I taught, and one of the students brought some fuel for a stove. The Americans in the group talked extensively with the student about how he had gas, along with all sorts of double entendres, and he was none-the-wiser. It's probably unethical to do that, but still fun. I'm sure my students did the same thing with me when I tried speaking Czech. They always liked when I said "ptak". They didn't think I knew its other meaning.
And, not to worry, your spoken English level will be back on par with your American counterparts within a month or two of returning to the states.
Shouldn't it be spelled Prog Blague?
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